AliExpress experiments - Non-watch products

[sub4me]

I found the ball scratcher link htttp://yourballsitchAlisellerballscratcher, you can find all sorts of crap on that Ali site.

 

[Tucker]

How do I post a non-clickable link? Im going to try this nipple clip Ali seller (he has 4.8 - great feedback) and I want to share the link but not break the rules. Thanks. Sorry man. I figured it out.

 

[Hazza]

:deadhorse:

 

[Fiddo]

How do I post a non-clickable link? Im going to try this nipple clip Ali seller (he has 4.8 - great feedback) and I want to share the link but not break the rules. Thanks. Sorry man. I figured it out.

1, Reply
2. Go Advanced.... Un-check this---------> Automatically parse links in text.

 

[Hazza]

1, Reply
2. Go Advanced.... Un-check this---------> Automatically parse links in text.

Do that, preview your post and often you will see it doesn't work

 

[SmqSub]

Thread Takeover!! Haha [emoji48]


Sent via morse code.

 

[chinachinaman]

Getchu some Yeezies! They'll change your life...

+1 on this

-Andrew

 

[C Master]

I'll share my review of the Monstro Humpty Bumpty, you can get them on Ali for around tree fiddy. shipped.

I bought the Monstro Humpty Bumpty Big Huge Giant Butt Plug with high expectations. I moved into the wonderful world of massive butt plugs as a New Years Resolution on Jan. 1, 2016. Prior to that I dabbled mostly in the small to medium range plugs. This year, however, things were gonna be different. What brought me to this plug was the three graduated knobs that I thought would help with insertion. Plus I love the black color for obvious reasons. In addition it is a monster plug, one that I knew would be a challenge to bury.

It was mid October when I finally pulled the trigger and ordered it. When the UPS dude handed it to me, he had no idea what he was delivering. I had it delivered at the office where I work as I didn't want wifey opening the box had it been delivered to my home. She wouldn't understand and knows nothing of this hobby of mine. By the weekend I had two hours of alone time to acquaint myself with “Lebron†as I named him. Setting the thing on the table I was taken by it's very cool lines. Someone really put a lot of thought into the architecture of the thing. I had to admit I had my doubts that I'd be able to handle all three segments. After some warm up exercises and a shot of gin I dove right into it. I usually like the shower to be my battleground for such endeavors. After a thorough cleaning of it with hand soap I set Lebron right on the shower floor and took a few deep breaths in with zen-like focus. Next I applied a dollop of vaseline to it. Basically I then just sat down on it. First thing I noticed was the base didn't offer the best support. It takes a lot of down pressure to get the first segment inside and the thing kept sliding out and falling over. Those were some frustrating moments wanting badly to get the party started, but not being able to achieve take-off. This might not be a problem if you had a partner to shove the thing inside. But I fly solo. After ten somewhat awkward minutes I finally hit pay-dirt. Think of a snake swallowing an egg. The first segment slipped in with a woosh. The second segment was actually easier, but the third segment was a bear. It fought for twenty minutes to get over the final hump before I finally ringed it. There is a tapering from the third segment to the final base shaft which causes the thing to essentially cork itself within you. If the base itself didn't taper back out, the thing would disappear inside you quicker than a ground hog into it's den. I wish they would have engineered it with a larger base shaft as well as a much larger base. With me, I came very close to swallowing the base shaft AND the base itself in one sudden motion. Luckily I saw it coming and was able to squeeze off at just the right time. Caught it by a hair though. Once one of these giants plants itself deep, even a proctologist will scratch his head trying to figure out a plan of extraction. I avoided that scenario, though, and quickly slipped into seventh heaven. I actually giggled aloud at my accomplishment, before feeling myself drift into deep relaxation. The plastic is just the right hardness and there are no imperfections such as mold lines which can ruin an experience quickly. The length is perfect and the graduations are nearly perfectly spaced to give you that fullness at just the right spots.

I spent around twenty minutes with it buried before setting about diggin the thing back out. Pulling such a large object out with such a small base is tough in the shower. There is not enough purchase to get your fingers on it when it's wet from shower water mixed with lube. But I finally managed to get him out. Once you back it out past the largest segment the thing rockets out like there's no tomorrow. I wasn't expecting it and the thing flew out and knocked over wifey's array of candles she keeps in the shower niche. All in all I think it's a very good product and appears well made. The thing is definitely built for the long haul. It's a substantial, quality plug. I'd have given it five stars except that I truly believe the final base shaft should be at least 3/4 of an inch larger, and the base itself should be two inches wider and one inch longer. What a nice ride though. It's a great piece of equipment for any big plugger to have in his arsenal. One final note. Did the company really needs to give it a name with eleven syllables? Instead of the Monstro Humpty Bumpty Big Huge Giant Butt Plug, how about calling it something simple, like Lebron?

Pics or it didn't happen!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[C Master]

@JAFO, do you have a pic of those jeweled butt plugs from Ali, the stainless with pink??

Ok, sorry, my part time chick kept me on the phone. Women, right?

Now, that one isn't the cheapest one I found. But the seller ships via e packet and says they ship out within 3 days. So you're looking at probably a week and a half before delivery. This one is supposedly 100% stainless steel so it should have good weight to it. The seller has good feedback for an Aliseller and their rating is pretty high. So I'd give this one a shot. Here's the non clickable link:

http://www.aliexpress.com/item/Meta..._8&btsid=2a8f74ee-a059-4bcc-b0bd-34b55e0177ff

You two are not seriously contemplating buying one from ALi................

You would honestly risk putting that where the sun doesn't shine? What if it is inferior and something breaks and it gets stuck? Do you just contact the seller and say I have a problem? He responds and says send it back. Then what do you do? [MENTION=73591]JAFO[/MENTION] you are considering buying the cheapest one you can get. Damn man think with your head not your ass. If you have the aforementioned problem then what do you do? When you go to contact the seller you will find he has disappeared faster than a hot snot.

Seriously guys this is a product you have to buy local, if you have a breakage problem you can walk/hobble discretely to the local store for advice and help.

As for jewels???????

Seriously I had a lot of respect for you two and I know I risk brigging but I have to say it. Do you really think the sun shines out of your ass? Its like a deco plate, who is going to see it? Why pay extra? Keep it simple boys.

I mean this advice as a friend no offence is intended, but that is up to you to decide. You need to put a lot more thought into this one.

 

[kiwijunglist]

Don't appreciate having to scroll through all this spam. Grow up.

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[chronosphere]

Don't appreciate having to scroll through all this spam. Grow up.

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++1

 

[b.hargrave]

Don't appreciate having to scroll through all this spam. Grow up.

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Agree mate. Im new to the forum and it all seems a bit pathetic. I get that some people don't have anything good to say about aliexpress, but seems abit childish to belittle someone for using it

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[Nivka]

I bought some really good socks. Made of bamboo. $1. They even threw in the left one for free. Technically not reps, but who wears branded socks anyway? Store was "wish you never grow old". I think $1 socks is the sweet spot for Ali. I'll admit this is a satirical post, but they actually are pretty good socks. Can't upload pics at the moment coz Tapatalk is playing up. PM me for link

 

[Thrasher]

I bought some really good socks. Made of bamboo. $1. They even threw in the left one for free. Technically not reps, but who wears branded socks anyway? Store was "wish you never grow old". I think $1 socks is the sweet spot for Ali. I'll admit this is a satirical post, but they actually are pretty good socks. Can't upload pics at the moment coz Tapatalk is playing up. PM me for link

Did you get a genuine 1:1 BOX?

 

[Nivka]

Did you get a genuine 1:1 BOX?

Nah, they just came in a crappy plastic baggy. I ordered them Jan 31 so shipping was slow. QC was good though: I had to refuse 3 because of pulled threads, but he usually got back to me within a day.

 

[C Master]

Grow up [MENTION=82129]Thrasher[/MENTION]

 

[Thrasher]

Grow up @Thrasher

OH OK!

 

[dave2889]

I'm kind of in agreement here that this thread is a serious thread about non-watch items so it would be good if we could continue discussing it in such a way. There used to be a lot of good contributions here. It's a bit unfair, we all agree to the no posting live links - that's fair enough.

Ideally could you stick to thread-crapping the Ali watch thread if you must?

I don't mean to be rude or pissy, just a shame to let what is/was a good and useful thread die. Cheers guys

(In before jewelled butt plugs are non-watch items)


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[Zeinharis]

I bought some really good socks. Made of bamboo. $1. They even threw in the left one for free. Technically not reps, but who wears branded socks anyway? Store was "wish you never grow old". I think $1 socks is the sweet spot for Ali. I'll admit this is a satirical post, but they actually are pretty good socks. Can't upload pics at the moment coz Tapatalk is playing up. PM me for link

Hey, same here, I've got a socks, bought it from the same store, and now its getting some patina effects.

Boy.. can't wait to polished it with good old Cape Cod.

Here's mine btw

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[Thrasher]

Really That is a fine Patina worthy of its own thread or a lengthy discussion right here.

Hey, same here, I've got a socks, bought it from the same store, and now its getting some patina effects.

Boy.. can't wait to polished it with good old Cape Cod.

Here's mine btw

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