In a pub quiz the other day I lost by one point. The question was where do women mostly have curly hair? Apparently, it's Africa .
I've heard that Apple have scrapped their plans for the new children's iPod after realizing that iTouch Kids is not a good product name.
You can say lots of bad things about pedophiles but at least they drive slowly past schools.
A biker goes to the doctor with hearing problems. "Can you describe the symptoms to me?" asked the doctor. "Yes. Homer is a fat yellow lazy bastard and Marge is a skinny bird with big blue hair."
A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin.
I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache."
Being a modest man, when I checked into my hotel on a recent trip, I said to the lady at the registration desk, "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."
To which she replied, "No, it's regular porn, you sick bastard.â€
A man is stopped by the police at midnight and asked where he’s going. “I’m on my way to a lecture about the effects of alcohol and drug abuse on the human body.†The policeman asks, “Really? And who’s going to give a lecture at this time of night?†“My wife."
I've heard that Apple have scrapped their plans for the new children's iPod after realizing that iTouch Kids is not a good product name.
You can say lots of bad things about pedophiles but at least they drive slowly past schools.
A biker goes to the doctor with hearing problems. "Can you describe the symptoms to me?" asked the doctor. "Yes. Homer is a fat yellow lazy bastard and Marge is a skinny bird with big blue hair."
A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin.
I said "How can you tell them apart?" He said "Her brother's got a moustache."
Being a modest man, when I checked into my hotel on a recent trip, I said to the lady at the registration desk, "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."
To which she replied, "No, it's regular porn, you sick bastard.â€
A man is stopped by the police at midnight and asked where he’s going. “I’m on my way to a lecture about the effects of alcohol and drug abuse on the human body.†The policeman asks, “Really? And who’s going to give a lecture at this time of night?†“My wife."
