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Children's Art Critic

Q5?

Legendary Member
Advisor
29/3/09
15,272
7
0




If you work in an office with lots of people, chances are that you work with a person who hangs pictures up that their kids have drawn. The pictures are always of some stupid flower or a tree with wheels. These pictures suck; I could draw pictures much better. In fact, I can spell, do math and run faster than your kids. So being that my skills are obviously superior to those of children, I've taken the liberty to judge art work done by other kids on the internet. I'll be assigning a grade A through F for each piece:





crapart5.jpg
Megan, age 4



First of all, I don't even know what this is. If it's supposed to be a dog, then it's the $hittiest dog I've ever seen. F


crapart4.jpg
Kyle, age 8


You spelled America wrong a$$hole. Also, I could have sworn America's colors were red, white and blue. There's no yellow anywhere, traitor.
F





crapart3.jpg
Lisa, age 6

Holy shit, I almost had a seizure when I saw this one. Three words: too many colors. Also, eggs aren't supposed to have ears, dipshit.F






crapart2.jpg
Cameron, age 4

Terrible.
F






crapart1.jpg
Bryce, age 10

This one wouldn't be too bad if the color were kept inside the lines, you picked a new perspective, used non-abrasive colors and asked someone with talent to paint it for you. On one hand I want to give an A for effort but... F





crapart2_4.jpg
Jon, age 8

Ding Ding! Here comes the shit-mobile. I've never seen a fire truck that needed to be shaved. I would rather be burned to death than be saved by this hairy piece of shit. F





crapart2_2.jpg
Rachel, age 7

That's interesting, everyone in this picture is white. Even the rainbow is white. Perhaps in an ideal world, everyone would be white isn't that right, Rachel? Or should I call you RACIST? Nice try, Hitler. F






crapart2_3.jpg
Jason, age 6

This one would receive an "A" if the assignment was to throw as much random shit onto a paper as poorly as you can. I've pissed patterns on snow that look more coherent than this. F







crapart2_5.jpg
Seth, age 4

Vrrrroooooooooooommmmmm! F







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Kelly, age 9


This was a Christmas gift from Kelly to her parents. Good job Kelly, now pack up your shit and find a foster home. If my kids tried to pass this off as a gift, they'd come home from school and find all their shit outside in a box. What a lousy gift, seriously. You give them video games and toys, and they give you some half-assed drawing with a crooked tree. I wonder how much a gift like this would set someone back. Five, maybe ten minutes to find a napkin and some markers? F

I can't believe how much I rule.

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=irule

 

PecMan

Respected Member
4/5/09
4,860
232
63
pecman opinion

by looking at the first picture i can tell immediatelly that that girl is a pervert !!! her mom better look for profesional help .

the second one makes me think a lot and i finally i got the conclusion that he is a future terrorist and in that picture he is sending as a message of future disaster !!! wrong spelling and wrong coloros!! how can u not c that????

good job with the grades
 

Q5?

Legendary Member
Advisor
29/3/09
15,272
7
0
Bump

OK I did not write this. I copied it from this guys web page. You need to click on the link to see the original stuff. Trust me here. It is so funny.
 

acharria

Respected Member
26/10/09
5,146
11
0
You efffnn FAKE bastard.....
You are a copyright infringer...
damn you...
btw, know im sure you are a fake teacher/instructor... :spank:
 

R2D4

Admin
Advisor
15/4/07
14,909
54
48
That's my daughters picture butt head!
 

Q5?

Legendary Member
Advisor
29/3/09
15,272
7
0
Oh it's so on now, ya oaf! :rofl:
 

Steelfish

Hǝɐpᴉᴎƃ ꓭɐɔʞ ᗡoʍᴎ Ոᴎpǝᴙ
Staff member
Administrator
Certified
Pah!!!! What a pack of talentless juveniles! :angry:

I don't know what they ever think they can contribute to the world of art as I know of no professional artist that..........oh hang on..........Jackson Pollock.

A precedent has been set.........these kids will make millions!

Hehe. Thanks Q, awesome stuff. :thumbsup:
 

Q5?

Legendary Member
Advisor
29/3/09
15,272
7
0
Okay how is this for a train conductor? :lol:

IMAG1217.jpg
 

Mendota

Respected Member
16/10/08
3,220
87
0
MN
I have received this joke in various emails over the years and it is just as hilarious every time I see it. It's an oldie but a goodie. I think I first received this one back in 2002...

:lol:
 

lc125

Known Member
18/1/11
191
0
16
Ding Ding! Here comes the shit-mobile. I've never seen a fire truck that needed to be shaved. I would rather be burned to death than be saved by this hairy piece of shit.

Hahahaha this one cracked me up.. Nice one :D

Sent from my HTC Sensation XE with Beats Audio Z715e with Tapatalk
 

jd01449

I'm Pretty Popular
20/2/12
1,216
0
0
Hilarious. As the parent of a 5 year old, I have seen tons of these.

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using Tapatalk 2