Higgy 8)
Anger management
>
> I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to
> make.
>
> I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying "Hello."
>
> I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn
> Carter?"
>
> Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right number,
> stupid!" and the phone was slammed down on me.
>
> I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down
> Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally
> transposed the last two digits.
>
> After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.
> When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're an asshole!" and
> hung up. I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and
> put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills
> or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!"
>
> It always cheered me up.
>
> When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic "asshole
> calling"
> would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John
> Smith from Verizon. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our
> Caller
> ID Program?"
>
> He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back
> and
> said, "That's because you're an asshole!"
>
> One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.
> Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had
> patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting
> for
> that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his
> back window which included his phone number, so I wrote down the number.
>
> A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had his
> number on speed dial) I thought that I'd better call the BMW asshole
> too.
> I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?" "Yes, it is", he
> said. "Can you tell me where I can see it?" I asked
>
> "Yes, I live at 34 Mowbray Blvd, in Vaucluse. It's a yellow house, and
> the car's parked right out in front."
>
> "What's your name?" I asked.
>
> "My name is Don Hansen," he said.
>
> "When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
>
> "I'm home every evening after five."
>
> "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
>
> "Yes?"
>
> "Don, you're an asshole!" Then I hung up, and added his number to my
> speed dial, too.
>
> Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call. Then I came up
> with an idea. I called Asshole #1. Hello." "You're an asshole!" (But I
> didn't hang up.) "Are you still there?" he asked. "Yeah," I said. "Stop
> calling me," he screamed. "Make me," I said.
>
> "Who are you?" he asked.
>
> "My name is Don Hansen."
>
> "Yeah? Where do you live Asshole?"
>
> "I live at 34 Mowbray Blvd, Vaucluse, a yellow house, with my black
> Beamer parked in front."
>
> He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start
> saying
> your prayers."
>
> I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole," and hung up.
>
> Then I called Asshole #2. "Hello?" he said. "Hello, asshole," I said. He
> yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..." "You'll what?" I said. "I'll
> kick your ass," he exclaimed.
>
> I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right
> now."
>
> Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at
> 34 Mowbray Blvd, Vaucluse, and that I was on my way over there to kill
> my
> gay lover.
>
> Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Mowbray
> Blvd, Vaucluse.
>
> I quickly got into my car and headed over to Mowbray. I got there just
> in
> time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front
> of
> six cop cars, an overhead police helicopter and a news crew.
>
> NOW I feel much better...........Anger management really works!!!!!:shock: :lol: Gotta love it!!!!!! :wink:
Anger management
>
> I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to
> make.
>
> I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying "Hello."
>
> I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn
> Carter?"
>
> Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right number,
> stupid!" and the phone was slammed down on me.
>
> I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down
> Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally
> transposed the last two digits.
>
> After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.
> When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're an asshole!" and
> hung up. I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and
> put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills
> or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!"
>
> It always cheered me up.
>
> When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic "asshole
> calling"
> would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John
> Smith from Verizon. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our
> Caller
> ID Program?"
>
> He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back
> and
> said, "That's because you're an asshole!"
>
> One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.
> Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had
> patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting
> for
> that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his
> back window which included his phone number, so I wrote down the number.
>
> A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had his
> number on speed dial) I thought that I'd better call the BMW asshole
> too.
> I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?" "Yes, it is", he
> said. "Can you tell me where I can see it?" I asked
>
> "Yes, I live at 34 Mowbray Blvd, in Vaucluse. It's a yellow house, and
> the car's parked right out in front."
>
> "What's your name?" I asked.
>
> "My name is Don Hansen," he said.
>
> "When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
>
> "I'm home every evening after five."
>
> "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
>
> "Yes?"
>
> "Don, you're an asshole!" Then I hung up, and added his number to my
> speed dial, too.
>
> Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call. Then I came up
> with an idea. I called Asshole #1. Hello." "You're an asshole!" (But I
> didn't hang up.) "Are you still there?" he asked. "Yeah," I said. "Stop
> calling me," he screamed. "Make me," I said.
>
> "Who are you?" he asked.
>
> "My name is Don Hansen."
>
> "Yeah? Where do you live Asshole?"
>
> "I live at 34 Mowbray Blvd, Vaucluse, a yellow house, with my black
> Beamer parked in front."
>
> He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start
> saying
> your prayers."
>
> I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole," and hung up.
>
> Then I called Asshole #2. "Hello?" he said. "Hello, asshole," I said. He
> yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..." "You'll what?" I said. "I'll
> kick your ass," he exclaimed.
>
> I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right
> now."
>
> Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at
> 34 Mowbray Blvd, Vaucluse, and that I was on my way over there to kill
> my
> gay lover.
>
> Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Mowbray
> Blvd, Vaucluse.
>
> I quickly got into my car and headed over to Mowbray. I got there just
> in
> time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front
> of
> six cop cars, an overhead police helicopter and a news crew.
>
> NOW I feel much better...........Anger management really works!!!!!:shock: :lol: Gotta love it!!!!!! :wink:
