Scurvy treasure hunt

[JellyJoe]

Ahoy and avast! Welcome thou be aboard this creacky ol' vessel. Arrr, ye's met tha scurvy crew 'ready hasn'ye. Enough rantin' by a hundred cannonballs, or ye'll dance tha hornpipe upon tha plank.
Tar tha deck from stem to stern, hoist the Jolly Roger

, get thy peglegs n hooks ready port n starboard, sons o' sharks.
Set sail bound out from Tortuga Isle to tha first clue, let da ol' wood plough da wave, rottin bildge rats. We's steerin light lined 'n hanker 'fter bootie plunderin.

YE OL' PAPERS.

RULE 1: ONLY PIRATE RANTIN' N CURSIN' O'ER HERE OR YE'LL WALK THA PLANK.
RULE 2: I NAIL A HINT TO THA MAINMAST

, YE GUESS IT RITE, I FLIP A SECRET MESSAGE INTO YER DIRTY POCKET, YE HAS 1 DAY ADVANTAGE FO' NEXT CLUE.

WHY'S THIS?
WHY, 'TIS A BLOODY TREASURE HUNT!
THERE'LL BE BOOTY

N GROG

FOR THA MOST CUNNINGEST OUT THERE, BUT WHAT'S IN THE CHEST 'TIS A BARNACLE-CRUSTED ROTT'N SECRET, SO DONT YE ASK.
RANT N CURSE, YE CANS TRY AT WILL, BUT 1 POST, 1 ANSWER; ONLY THA 1ST TRY EACH POST COUNTS. NO CHEATIN OR YE GO KISS THA KEEL.
AYE AYE NO LIMITS BUT THA PIRATE SPEECH. YE DOSN'T TALK LIKE A PIRATE, YE GET STING-PLANKED OFFBOARD!

1st HINT:

Tha ol' parchment says:
"Seek tha ol' wannabee, who's life was saved by square n compass from an unknown traveller.
He conquereth the treasure with tha help o' his fella, tho endeth down tha plank for his bride-to-be's scratch.
His fella got away with it for us tha story to tell.

Only a name is needeth here.
The first to yell it, first gets the next clue.

Cap'n ol' Jelly Joe"

 

[JellyJoe]

TREASURE HUNT!

TRANSLATION FOR THE ARRRHH IMPAIRED:

RULE 1: IF POSSIBLE, ONLY PIRATE SLANG.
RULE 2: I NAIL A NOTE WITH A HINT TO THE MAINMAST

, YOU GUESS IT RIGHT, I FLIP A SECRET MESSAGE INTO YOUR POCKET, YOU HAVE 1 DAY ADVANTAGE FOR NEXT CLUE.
THE HINT CAN BE SOURCED FROM GEOGRAPHY, HISTORY, LITERATURE, FANTASY AND GENERAL CULTURE.

THERE'LL BE TREASURE FOR THE WINNER, BUT WHAT'S IN THE CHEST IS A SECRET, SO DONT ASK.
YOU CAN TRY AT WILL, BUT 1 POST, 1 ANSWER; ONLY THE 1ST TRY EACH POST COUNTS.
OPEN TO EVERYBODY INCLUDING NOOBS, ADMINS AND MODS, BUT TO OPEN THE TREASURE CHEST YOU WILL HAVE TO UPGRADE TO VIP.
I OBVIOUSLY CANNOT REGISTER.

HINT TRANSLATION:

"Seek the old wannabee, who's life was saved by square and compass from an unknown traveller.
He conquered the treasure with the help of his fellow, though ended down the plank for his bride-to-be's scratch.
His fellow got away with it to tell us the story.

Only a name is needed here.
The first to name it, first gets the next clue.

Captain old Jelly Joe".

 

[pedecter]

Aye, that be Rev. Josiah Henson. Arghhh! Grog!

 

[JellyJoe]

Blimey, interesting guess lad, but nay, t'was wrong.
Try again for yer good fortune, everybody.

 

[R2D4]

Orenthall James Simpson?

 

[JellyJoe]

Nay, nice try, but not tha rite answer, yer Cap'n
Ye's free to try again, ye ol' bildge jailbird.

 

[markh]

Arrrgh... That be Uncle Tom matey!

 

[9postguy]

Gilligan

 

[JellyJoe]

Both nice tries ye scurvy deck jacks, but alas, nay they's wrong answers.
Ye's free to keep on trying fer treasure chest to win.

 

[markh]

that be cap'n Jack Sparrow?

 

[JellyJoe]

Nay nay, matey. Read carefully tha parchment n try again n ye might get it rite.

 

[pcsam]

mason

 

[JellyJoe]

Alas, nay, ol' hungry son of a squid. Try yer fortune again, ye might hit tha bullseye.

 

[JellyJoe]

Avast lads, get around!
Remember ye cans try as many times as ye want, but not in tha same post.


Extra Hint:

Tha unknown traveller be a brother in a very big brotherhood...

 

[markh]

ye old scoundrel Ben Franklin?

 

[pcsam]

rrrrrrrrrrrrrr Phineas Bogg rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
poly want a rolex rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

 

[JellyJoe]

Mmmhh alas, both good guesses but they's wrong. Keep trying lads!

 

[trksh-bzr]

oooohh, arrrrr- whiskey and melted candle wax in me jarr, can't hear eh blady thig since the grim gast of the vessel big bang remoooved me buggin ears (buckaneers) with a sharrrrrrrrpned sugar cane! but read the writng still this man of the seas can, could it be the awfull mr hikamullah mesud of taleban, who is known to download porn from pirate bay without permission??

 

[JellyJoe]

Argh, nay rott'n keel barnacle, wrong guess twas yer one!
But keep tryin n ye shores if tha winds favour thee.

 

[markh]

arggghh... davy jones?