- 11/2/15
- 6,147
- 1,215
- 113
I ate too much food for lunch and now I'm tired.
After you buy one IPhone they make another one a year later.
My garbage disposal eats better than 98% of the world.
I lost weight, and now all of my clothes don't fit.
"United States" wasn't at the Top of the Drop-Down Menu.
The free wifi here is slower than my mobile data.
I went to target today and the automatic door wasn't working, so I had to use the manual one.
Too hot with sweater on, too cold without it.
I could have slept for another 5 minutes this morning.
One click on my mechanical pencil isnt enough, and two clicks is too much.
I vacuumed two spiders and now I'm afraid to turn the vacuum off.
I accidentally bought conditioner when I needed to buy more shampoo.
My massage was so long that the relaxing music started to repeat.
My iPhone 5 is on backorder so I have to keep using my 4 like a ******* caveman.
I really want to complain but I've forgotten what I want to complain about.
I use Google Chrome, so my lack of need to go to the actual Google domain causes me to miss most of the special occasion logos.
I want the new iPhone, but my contract isn't up until next year.
My maid re-organized my bathroom and now I can't find my toothbrush.
I pay for hulu plus and still get ads.
I overcooked the Bacon.
My favorite bands are playing at different music festivals on the same weekend.
Someone paid me by check, so now I have to go to the bank to deposit it.
I shared my Netflix password with a friend. He's ruining my suggestions with his shitty taste.
I have excellent health insurance, but I'm too healthy to get any benefit from it.
My school banned girls from wearing yoga pants.
I got a haircut and now everyone is saying, "Hey did you got a haircut?" My cigarette ran out of batteries.
The cleaning lady stole my mood ring and I don't know how to feel about it.
My house is too big for the wifi to reach my bedroom.
All my friends are studying for finals, so I have no one to drink with.
My friends guest room has a sleep number bed that won't allow me to change the setting.
I'm comfortable, but I'll never know if I could be more comfortable. I'm so poor.
I've only got enough money for rent, food and a couple of nights out this month.
I have a test on my birthday. Gas prices went up again. Three to five business days.
Powerpoint presentations. The pizza guy can't find my house so now I have to stand outside and wave like an idiot.
I can't decide which country to go to for my graduation gift. My towel is still wet from my first shower today.
I can't find a reason to buy an iPad, I just want one.
I have to wait a month until my upgrade to get the new iPhone 5.
The WiFi on my flight across America is not fast enough to watch YouTube videos.
The green light was too short this morning and I was forced to feel guilty for not giving money to the homeless guy.
My dog walks while she poops.
The water fountain is too cold and it hurts my teeth.
My smartphone changes "lol" to "LOL" making me sound more amused than I actually am. I
never have enough time to sleep. Also, I never have enough time to play video games because I have to sleep.
I can't do my homework on my Macbook Pro, so I have to use a PC at the library.
There's never been a hurricane with my name.
It's too hot in my room with the fan off, and too loud with the fan on, so I can't sleep.
Homework is preventing me from doing more productive things.
Where I work is so close to my home that I can't hear a complete song while driving there.
My boobs are too big to go running.
I poured just the right amount of cereal, but there was so little left in the box that I had to pour and eat the rest of it too.
The lowest brightness setting on my iPad is still too bright to read in the dark.
The cleaning lady woke me up.
I just took a shower and now I have to poop.
Amazon is about to start charging me sales tax.
The guy at the fast food drive through is starting to recognize me.
I've overplayed all the decent songs within my preferred genres of music, and now I hate them all.
After you buy one IPhone they make another one a year later.
My garbage disposal eats better than 98% of the world.
I lost weight, and now all of my clothes don't fit.
"United States" wasn't at the Top of the Drop-Down Menu.
The free wifi here is slower than my mobile data.
I went to target today and the automatic door wasn't working, so I had to use the manual one.
Too hot with sweater on, too cold without it.
I could have slept for another 5 minutes this morning.
One click on my mechanical pencil isnt enough, and two clicks is too much.
I vacuumed two spiders and now I'm afraid to turn the vacuum off.
I accidentally bought conditioner when I needed to buy more shampoo.
My massage was so long that the relaxing music started to repeat.
My iPhone 5 is on backorder so I have to keep using my 4 like a ******* caveman.
I really want to complain but I've forgotten what I want to complain about.
I use Google Chrome, so my lack of need to go to the actual Google domain causes me to miss most of the special occasion logos.
I want the new iPhone, but my contract isn't up until next year.
My maid re-organized my bathroom and now I can't find my toothbrush.
I pay for hulu plus and still get ads.
I overcooked the Bacon.
My favorite bands are playing at different music festivals on the same weekend.
Someone paid me by check, so now I have to go to the bank to deposit it.
I shared my Netflix password with a friend. He's ruining my suggestions with his shitty taste.
I have excellent health insurance, but I'm too healthy to get any benefit from it.
My school banned girls from wearing yoga pants.
I got a haircut and now everyone is saying, "Hey did you got a haircut?" My cigarette ran out of batteries.
The cleaning lady stole my mood ring and I don't know how to feel about it.
My house is too big for the wifi to reach my bedroom.
All my friends are studying for finals, so I have no one to drink with.
My friends guest room has a sleep number bed that won't allow me to change the setting.
I'm comfortable, but I'll never know if I could be more comfortable. I'm so poor.
I've only got enough money for rent, food and a couple of nights out this month.
I have a test on my birthday. Gas prices went up again. Three to five business days.
Powerpoint presentations. The pizza guy can't find my house so now I have to stand outside and wave like an idiot.
I can't decide which country to go to for my graduation gift. My towel is still wet from my first shower today.
I can't find a reason to buy an iPad, I just want one.
I have to wait a month until my upgrade to get the new iPhone 5.
The WiFi on my flight across America is not fast enough to watch YouTube videos.
The green light was too short this morning and I was forced to feel guilty for not giving money to the homeless guy.
My dog walks while she poops.
The water fountain is too cold and it hurts my teeth.
My smartphone changes "lol" to "LOL" making me sound more amused than I actually am. I
never have enough time to sleep. Also, I never have enough time to play video games because I have to sleep.
I can't do my homework on my Macbook Pro, so I have to use a PC at the library.
There's never been a hurricane with my name.
It's too hot in my room with the fan off, and too loud with the fan on, so I can't sleep.
Homework is preventing me from doing more productive things.
Where I work is so close to my home that I can't hear a complete song while driving there.
My boobs are too big to go running.
I poured just the right amount of cereal, but there was so little left in the box that I had to pour and eat the rest of it too.
The lowest brightness setting on my iPad is still too bright to read in the dark.
The cleaning lady woke me up.
I just took a shower and now I have to poop.
Amazon is about to start charging me sales tax.
The guy at the fast food drive through is starting to recognize me.
I've overplayed all the decent songs within my preferred genres of music, and now I hate them all.
